Family is an important part in everyone’s lives, but it can just be as heavy a topic for many as well. Today, there are plenty of family structures that exist aside from the traditional nuclear family many learn about and grow up in.
While these matters are important to learn about, it’s admittedly a complicated topic, especially for the young ones who have yet to wrap their heads around relationships in general. But, rather than not teaching them about these, it’s actually a good idea to do the opposite which is to teach them. Not only does it take away that stigma there, but also helps them to better understand that everyone has different circumstances and experiences. Despite that, it doesn’t mean that what they have is less or more, because ultimately family is the people who unconditionally love and support one another while also pushing its members to change for the better.
The Types of Family Structures
Before diving into helping the children understand the family structures in society that exist, here’s a little refresher. There might be some more in here that perhaps you aren’t aware of yourself.
Nuclear Family
The traditional type of family most people know about. It consists of two parents and a child. Society generally has a good perception about the nuclear family, and has long regarded it to be the ideal family to have when raising a child. It’s because children receive stability from this family type aside from gaining love and strength from their parents.
Single Parent Family
As the name suggests, this family type has one parent raising a child or more. It can be a single mother or a single father, or simply a single person who chose to raise a child. The single parent family is a stark difference from the Nuclear family—at least to society, as it is quite a change (sometimes is even looked down on by some depending on how the single parent family came to be) but as time progressed, many people have become more open minded to it. It is well known just how difficult it is to raise a child in this type of family.
Extended Family
An extended family is when the nuclear family includes more of their blood related relatives—aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, etc. They all live within the same household and are quite the big family.
Childless Family
Many people consider having a family as having children, but there are married couples who either choose not to have children or are unable to conceive one. As such, this family type tends to be widely ignored as it doesn’t really fit the conventional markers of what a family is. In place of a child, this family type adopt pets or are close with their nieces and nephews. Childless family types consist of two partners who live and work together.
Stepfamily
As unfortunate or sad as it may sound, some marriages eventually turn sour leading to a divorce, but sometimes it is for the better. Unfortunately, the child gets in between it. But once they’ve found a new partner and have married, this usually turns into a stepfamily which consists of a new spouse and their children from previous marriages thus creating what is also considered as a blended family. It takes time for everyone to adjust and presents unique challenges and difficulties to its members.
Grandparent Family
In more recent times, more grandparents are raising their grandchildren due to a couple of different reasons such as the parents working somewhere faraway, or could have passed away. Whatever the case is, the grandparents have taken it upon themselves to stand in as the parent for their grandchild.
How to Teach Your Kids About Different Family Structures
Give the topic a lot of thought
Clarify your feelings and thoughts about other family configurations within society, and think how to best phrase your responses once the question from your kids inevitably pops up one day. While you may have previously given basic answers to their questions, they might come back wanting to know more details about it later on. It’s good to give the topic a lot of thought so that you’re able to best express your answers on it.
Don’t force it. Rather, discuss the topic when it naturally is brought up.
There isn’t really a need to have a sit down with a serious discussion on it. Rather, let it happen naturally and when the question arises from the kids, instead of deflecting, answer them. Additionally, just letting them know that you are there if they have questions on their mind is a great way of saying that you are open to talk with them.
Give straightforward responses
Balance the information you’re about to impart to them. While it depends mostly on their age and level of understanding, make sure that you’re not confusing them with your words. So, keep it simple and straightforward, but also in a way that’s easy to digest which means no use of difficult words they haven’t even learned about. Furthermore, if they ask about others' families, try to first find out why they want to know and then either ask them what they think or have them guess what you think about it. Afterwards, start reminding them that every family is different and then answer their specific question.
Gently correct misconceptions
Children have wild imaginations and may even hear various things about certain topics from school that could influence the way they think and perceive things. A child might notice why their friend’s mother doesn’t show up to parent-meetings or other events, and it could start a wildfire of misconceptions. Moreover, your own kid could also be bullied if for example their dad isn’t present much to school events because of work. In this case, tell them more about your family and remind them that they are loved.
Have patience
Over the years, these questions will continue popping up until the time the children finally are able to fully understand it and have formed an opinion on them based on the guidance they have given. Until that time comes, consistently remind and reassure them that family ultimately is made up of people who love them the most and want only for them to become better people.
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