Family is known to be the foundation of who we are and what we may become in the future. In simpler terms, it’s a significant part of our life. It’s the main reason we exist. We learn to live, to love. We learn to disagree, to compromise. All these apprehensions are rooted in the little collective unit we call “Family.”
To an extent, a family may be the cause of a lot of things. Either mishaps or sweet victories. For instance, problematic and suicidal children may stem from toxic family environments. Opposingly, active and driven children may come from supportive families. One very similar fact between these two children is that their behavior is influenced by family.
This is why the start of one’s own collective unit called “family” is described as either one of two things—great and crucial.
The start a family is a decision entailed with great long-term effects crucial to others’ welfare and your own. Being said that, it is not an impulsive decision to make.
To some, this decision may come off as a blur. An unclear notion in their minds clouded with hesitancy.
To others, however, it’s a long dream awaiting to get a hold on. And to those people, the time when to start a family doesn’t usually reveal itself in just a snap of a finger. More often, it’s something you have to come to terms with on your own. And typically, they pop up as questions that make you assess the bits and pieces of your life.
Am I financially Ready?
Families come with responsibilities. More specifically, financial responsibilities that you, as a parent, have to fulfill. One of the most crucial factors to think about when being a parent is affordability. It is important to understand that you should be a good provider to your family before even starting one.
Multiple parents struggle financially. Poverty is a concept feared by many but is also experienced by many. And families are no stranger when it comes to poverty. It’s an obvious fact. Family sustainment is one of the biggest expenses people deal with.
From basic needs such as diapers, food, clothing, down to your family’s wants—it’s yours to provide. The expenses don't stop there. As time progresses, so do the costs. Education, medical expenses, children’s allowances, they are pretty much endless.
It’s a must to make sure that you are financially capable of the provision of these expenses before hitting the green light. This determines the kind of lifestyle you want your future family to live in. So before you decide, ensure you have a sufficient income.
Am I ready to adjust my lifestyle?
What comes as a package deal when you make a family is Change. Change and Family are a buy one get one kind of thing. You want a family, you should be willing to make adjustments to your lifestyle.
From what you used to be to what you are now, all that may alter a lot.
It’s a bittersweet sacrifice you’ll have to take. You might have to bid your goodbyes to the lazy weekends and say hello to long hours of work. It means that others’ needs come before your own. Those you care about and love the most.
When you learn to adapt to the change, you’ll realize that it’s not so hard after all, and it may even be a gain to you as you become an effective parent.
Do I have a stable relationship?
What most people don’t ponder about when deciding to make a family is the integral role of relationships between a husband and wife. More and more children nowadays live life with either divorced parents or parents that just simply won’t get along. And while a lot may not realize it, this is something that greatly affects their children. Subconsciously, this may be the cause of their behavioral issues such as delinquency or aggression toward others.
A happy family comes from two happy partners. These two partners become the cornerstone of the whole household which is why their relationship is of great importance. A shaky foundation results in easily destroyed homes.
If a weak relationship is something of your concern, it is best to put starting a family on hold and strengthen the relationship first. Communicate, comprehend, and fix what needs to be fixed. Remember, a baby does not become the solution to a dismantled relationship. If anything, this may only cause more harm.
Will I be a good parent?
Parenting is one of the skills that take years of practice. A lot of parents can’t say for sure that they’ve mastered it even after how many years. It’s definitely not just a simple babysitting session,
it’s far different than that.
It’s raising a child. That in itself takes a whole lot of courage to do. And surprisingly, it takes even an extra amount of courage to do well.
To instill values, virtues, and principles in a child is a tedious challenge. And to be honest, not everyone is up for it.
So ponder upon that. Do you believe you have the skills, the patience, and the willpower to never give up despite the consecutive headaches your child gives? Do you think this is a commitment you can take?
Good parenting skills are never acquired overnight. They most definitely don’t get attained by just reading parenting books. The best knowledge comes from experience, this quote is most relevant when it comes to being a parent.
Take that in and think for a while, not just about the cute and endearing parts of becoming a parent but also the restless, stress-induced parts. The lectures you’ll give and the lengths you'll go to make sure your child is headed on the right path. All the love you’ll give—both the soft & tough love.
Once you’ve deeply digested that and you still think that the challenge is worth the major headaches. Strap on and buckle up, because you’ve got a wild ride ahead of you.
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