Parenthood transforms a lot of lives. It changes one’s lifestyle and adds a responsibility that can never be shaken off ever again once it arrives. One continues to be a parent even when their child is already a full grown adult, and once their child begins a family and starts having kids, by extension they become their parents as well. It is no brainer then, that being a parent is a big deal. One, their lives aren’t solely theirs anymore once their little bundle of happiness is born, and second, a lot of sacrifices and compromises must be made in order to accommodate this new life. So while it may seem that after marriage, starting a family is the natural order of things, it still must be given plenty of thought. Here are some things to consider before becoming a parent.
Are you ready?
The first big question doesn’t really come as a surprise because ushering a new life into the family isn’t as simple as a one plus one equation. Both partners have to be ready and are on the same page when it comes to trying to grow the family. Are they willing to lose sleep at night trying to calm down a crying baby? Or lose time for themselves in order to respond to the immediate needs of their child? Furthermore, the life of a mom in particular isn’t easy. As they say, parenthood starts the moment those two lines in the pregnancy test result show up and being a mother who will carry the baby for at least 10 months, they will definitely have a difficult time as the changes slowly take place. Meanwhile, being a father not only means working to earn money for the family, but also to become a pillar of support for their wife. Hence, one has to not only be physically ready for this role but also mentally ready.
There is less time for yourself
As mentioned earlier, parents lose time for themselves trying to keep up with their child’s needs. To some, having time for oneself is an important factor in their lifestyle that perhaps they aren’t prepared to sacrifice yet. However, as a parent, the responsibility isn’t something they can run away from nor can they easily slip away from to even give themselves a short break. This is important to consider because this is where the weight of being a parent can be most felt—it’s when they devote most of their time towards their child and family. Sometimes, it can even cause a burnout.
Will you be able to provide for the child?
Every parent wishes to give their child the best that they can offer, sometimes even better than what they’ve personally experienced. Thus it is vital to consider the financial aspect. How much can one currently provide for their child? Do both parents have stable jobs or are earning enough money to accommodate not only themselves but also a potential new life into the household? It is no surprise that all parents want the best for their young one, but being rich isn’t really necessary to be able to expand the family; what’s more important is that they are able to provide for their child’s basic needs. Therefore, a thorough review of both partner’s budgets might be necessary as well as their long term plans career wise.
Consider a parenting style
Parenting styles vary in every household. What’s effective for someone else’s kid might not be suitable for another child. Considering what parenting style to use is important as this’ll be how one disciplines their child and how they will be able to build a healthy parent-child relationship. Though it may seem too daunting to think about, it’s important to not be too hard on oneself. It may help to look back on how one’s own parents raised their children. Were they strict? Did they spend enough time with their kids? Ultimately, both partners should be on the same page when it comes to how they want to raise their child.
Is your relationship stable?
A baby won’t fix relationship problems. It shouldn’t even be an option to think about, especially if both partners are on bad terms with each other or are in the midst of trying to solve or overcome a problem together. Sometimes the situation may become even worse once the baby arrives. Not only does this affect the future of the child, but also the family that they are supposed to belong to. Therefore, make sure that both partners have a stable and healthy relationship with one another before even considering having a baby. The baby needs to grow up in a home where the parents are able to give both their support. This is also a great way to ensure that we don’t add another broken individual into society once they come of age.
Your life will be forever changed
Parenthood despite its many challenges and difficulties is still a rewarding experience, especially when parents get to witness how far in life their child has come. But it is not only in this aspect that it is rewarding. Personal growth and understanding becomes even more massive when taking care of a child as it truly does test a parent’s patience but overall, it enables them to love much more and to broaden their knowledge and perception of many things. On the other hand, it also means that one is essentially a parent for the rest of their lives. Soon enough, when their child is a fully grown adult who begins to have a family of their own and starts having kids, by extension they also become their parents—grandparents this time. And this is a very big leap or transition into one’s life. Being a parent is long term and is an enduring responsibility.
Many dream of having their own family and kids, but sometimes they might not actually be ready despite wishing for it. Hopefully, these few points helped to get a clearer picture of how parenthood drastically changes one’s life.
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